Happy Friday, I guess...

3 day weekend! I wish I had anything at all interesting to be blogging about. I feel extremely inadequate as a person actually that there's absolutely nothing of relevance or substance floating around my brain right now that I feel would be blog worthy material. Maybe I'm losing my touch. When I had a myspace I always had something or another to throw out there for the masses. But today, nada. I apologize for my uselessness. =/

I don't think anyone really gets it...

I'm done with the drama. I don't care who hates you cause of whatever reason, or who talked shit about who. I'm too tired of it, and I have more important things I can focus my energy on, for instance...filling my bank account back up. Planning trips, and figuring out what classes to take in the fall, because it's about time I actually do something with myself.

I don't have time to be angry anymore either. Please, if you're in a piss poor mood...just steer clear of my location. I like smiling, laughing, and fun. If none of those sound appealing, take a hike.

In other news, 3 day weekend here I come!

Maybe the ice around my heart finally melted.

I was at work today and we have this little Thomas the train play area set up right outside the grooming room in between that and the puppies play rooms. So there's always kids staring at me and hanging around out there. I didn't have any appointments scheduled so I was mingling with customers who were looking at the puppies trying to convince them to take one home, since I can't :) Anyway, after I got through suckering an adorable old couple (who just put there 2 sixteen year old cocker spaniels to sleep 6 weeks ago) into buying a teeny tiny little shihtzu/yorkie I was walking back to the groom room and happened upon a lost little boy.
His name was Ryan and he was 3 years old. For being so young, and seemingly lost, he was sooo calm and collected. He looked up at me and said, " Hey, hi I was too busy playin' Thomas and now my dad just left me here!" Hahaha...I was like, "Oh I'm sure he didn't just leave you here. Why don't we go try and find him?" And so we did.

I'm not sure what it was...but between that, and my pseudo nephew's parent/teacher conference review...My 100% I do NOT want kids meter...is now more of a 70/30 Not sure anymore if I do or not meter. What?? Well, okay...to be fair there are alot of factors that contributed to the 100% NO meter. There was a point in time where I thought I did want kids. And then after so many failed relationships, growing up with my bitter ass parents, the crumbling world we live in, and things I'd rather not openly discuss here...I just found it easier to convince myself that I definitely didn't want that burden.

I'm thinking, I will just leave this one up to fate, destiny....whatever. If it happens one day in the future then fine, if not...well, that's okay too. I guess it's better to just go with the flow of things. Whatever will be will be.

I guess the most difficult thing for me is what comes before the baby. The whole being in love thing...I love being in love. I really do. And even after so many heartbreaks...I'm still willing to take that leap of faith and trust another human being with my heart time and time again.

I suppose if I find someone who's going to make it their goal to keep my heart safe, I might feel differently on the whole having kids issue.

Right now, I'm just gonna leave it at never say never.

I'm probably going to sleep in an ice water bath.

Don't get me wrong...I love summer. Summer to me is a renewal of life, relaxation, BBQ's, camping, beer gardens, fireworks, and just tons of fun. But, the not so fun part is when you don't have any escape from the humid Chicago heat. Tom (my dad) is essentially against air conditioning I guess unless it's over 100 degrees and the news anchors issue heat advisories.
I'd sit in my car, but my fault...I never got my compressor fixed so my A/C in the truck doesn't work either. FAIL. I won't be able to get it fixed for another month because I'm fucking broke..but only for a short while longer. Thankfully.

If it didn't disrupt my sleep, I wouldn't even mind. Except that it does, I just can't get comfortable and never fully go into a deep sleep. Which, fucking sucks. At least my brother's room is in the basement which is always at least 10 or more degrees cooler than the rest of the house. So, he's got that going for him.

On another note, life is good =) Good job, and a great boy...I'm all set right now.

Potato tossing, fish shooting, & garlic baseball.

It's funny what you'll find to amuse yourself with limited resources, and stripped of basically any modern techonology. Other than a thermal imaging camera, which you'll really only use to take a picture of a pee stream.

Aside from the fist-sized bees, and the threat of ticks and chiggers always in the horizon...it was a wonderfully relaxing, and refreshing get away. I got to shoot 3 different guns which I'm pretty sure I'm addicted to now.

I'd like to go back, although at this point in time in the year, it's insanely hot, making it incredibly hard to be active between the hours of like...8 a.m. and 6 p.m.

There's almost nothing I can think of that is better than sitting around a campfire with a beer and some friends with incredible stars and the sounds of frogs and owls as your soundtrack.

Well...back to the grind tomorrow. Til next time middle o' nowhere Illinois.

I mean, you are breaking the law...

So Highland Park HS canceled their girl's basketball team's trip to Arizona because of AZ's new immigration law. I, personally think this law should be in every state. It makes plenty of sense if you ask me. Every other country has stringent laws about entering onto their soil. Why is that we make it so easy for these people to blend into the rest of society?? If I want to go even to any of the countries bordering ours I need at least a passport card. Which is pretty neat, and it's only half the cost of an actual passport. Passport cards are only good for traveling by land or sea...if you're filing for a new passport you can get one of these with it for only $50 more.

Anyway...I just can't believe that any legitamate U.S. citizen would have a problem with law enforcement doing their job. I mean, last time I checked...it IS illegal to be in the country without appropriate documentation. Hence the term, illegal immigrants. So...this is gonna sound bad, but sorry your country blows...but you can't just come here all nonchalantly and take money from our economy and send it back to your country...or can you? Cause apparently some of you have a problem rectifying this problem...

This is a smoke free body...

So, I haven't smoked innnn about 3 months. At first, it was so weird. I was so used to having cigarettes, and smoking while I drink...but now it feels normal. I try not to, but I occasionally catch myself being one of those assholes I hated when I smoked who just scoffs and scowls and gives you shit about smoking. I'm sure I've done it to one of you at some point these passed few months. I'm sorry...I know it's none of my damn business. I do feel better, and I do like that I don't smell like an ashtray the next day after going out. Or better yet, that my whitening toothpaste actually works now. Who knew??

I don't really have anything inciteful, or worldly to discuss today. I'm going for my drug screening in a couple hours (which I will pass, thank you very much), and I start my new job on Wednesday. Fabulous. I keep imagining all the shoes I'll be able to buy and I just wanna do a Risky Business dance through the kitchen...too bad Tom's (my dad) home.

After that I plan to go for a run at Swallow Cliff, that is if my running friend comes through.
I'm putting lazy on the shelf and gettin' to the fitness.

Catch ya on the flip side.

...Or is it?

William Shakespeare once said, "The very substance of the ambitious is the shadow of a dream."
I don't really know at what point I stopped striving for the best possible version of myself, but a few days ago a seemingly harmless drunken conversation turned into the best motivational speech I've ever gotten.
You should never stop wanting more. No one's been on their death bed wishing they'd had less love, less money, less success...
What's wrong with wanting more? There's a difference between always bettering one's self, and being gluttoness and greedy. If what you reach for is greatness, how can it be wrong?
I've never been one to want to sit idle and watch the world around me go out and get their's...
I've always been artistic, and driven, with a love and passion for learning and for the world. I wish I could figure out at what point I decided to take off my rose colored glasses. I know that reality is sometimes harsh, and scary, and brutally overwhelming...but isn't it better than the alternative?